The Dumbest Rocket Scientist I Know

There are times that I am utterly stunned stupid by occasional¬† stunts pulled by my brilliant, real-life rocket scientist (aerospace engineer) husband. Our daughter Kathleen has been on us relentlessly about teaching her to drive.¬† Michael has been quite resistant while I’m all for it.

So imagine my shock when I look out the window this afternoon only to see my brand new Volvo Cross Country half on the lawn and half on the road. It was surreal. I’m pretty sure I actually rattled my head back and forth in an attempt to clear my vision. “Is that Mich…no…wait a damn minute….blonde hair???!!!!…you have got to be freaking kidding me!!!????? Then I heard the toilet flush. In the house. Five feet from me.

Mama Bear reared up and hollered in her very best Mama Bear voice, “IS THAT CHILD BY HERSELF IN THE CAR??!!” Calm and utterly unflappable, soon-to-be-divorced husband meanders out of the washroom pulling up his fly and replies, “Yep. I told her she could drive the car into the driveway.”

“YOU DID WHAT?????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BY HERSELF??????!!!!!!!!

He blinks at me, utterly perplexed at this rapidly accelerating force of nature exploding in his face. I look out the window again only to see another car come around the corner with Kathleen stranded in the middle of the road. Pyjama-clad and bare foot, I blast out of the front door mastering a calm but VERY authoritarian tone and command,¬† “STOP KATE!”

Thankfully she does. I turn to said husband with my jaw dropped and eyes wide open in disbelief. He then utters the fateful words husbands around the globe have uttered as their last…”You were the one … that was all in a hurry to get her driving!”

Visitation hours will be posted later.

2 Responses to “The Dumbest Rocket Scientist I Know”

  1. Gill Parente Says:

    October 25th, 2010 at 1:03 am

    I believe that driving a car requires some sort of licence at a legal age of 16… however I believe farming communities drive all sorts of large equipment at all ages… boating has only recently been policed somewhat seriously… ATV and skidoo activity is practised without any controlled limitations year round…and I understand that children of 14 or less have and continue to fly planes throughout Canadian airspace…volvos are pretty safe vehicles give her a field and let her go supervised of course and by 16 she will be ready for the road…my daughter is hoping to get her pilots licence one day:)

  2. Richard Says:

    October 25th, 2010 at 5:09 pm

    We had our daughter wait til she was 18 to start to learn to drive because we felt she wasn’t mature enough until then. And then we had her start by taking a course.

Leave a Reply

Back to Spontaneous Combustion

Joanne's Blog RSS feed

Enter your email address to subscribe to Joanne's Blog Updates:

Delivered by FeedBurner